spring time!!

i always thought spring time existed only in laa laa land. where it is just a dream that flowers bloom and birds sweep over the air singing happy songs.

then i realised....it does happen in reality. it's just so hidden in quiet places!

we went to the golden gate bridge nature park today. and man...spring is really spring.

there are like nice little white flowers growing on the grass..it's so happy the flowers look like their going "HELLO" in cute lil high pitch voices..like in enid blyton. the happy flowers are scattered all over the grass fields making it look more white than green. bro and i took a try in lying on the grass like all the other americans (who by the way...lie on ANY patch of grass they can find...and i really mean ANY patch of grass. we found people lying on grass even within the civic square....like..outside the courthouse, parliament house and all that BIG BIG buildings that scream SACRED!)

the park is superbly beautiful. it was so nice it looked like it came straight out of a storybook. it was like...perfect...tall trees among the shorter ones...some with nice crispily warm orangy-red leaves...white flowers dotting the plains...happy relaxed couples and families picnic- king around. man....love the kind of lifestyle.

OH..one cool thing. there were free lindy-hop lessons going on in the park and there was like this massive bunch of couples just dancing. it was so entertaining!! it felt like the scene from enchanted....only less glamorous and coordinated. haha. but it was still cool watching couples dance..or at least try to. i loved watching the mother daughter bunch dancing. it was like a picture perfect family. man...really admired them. i do hope i become a mother like her. :)

ah yes...happy happy day :)

we went to the Academy of Art University Open house yesterday and the whole business-y professional and marketing shit reminded my bro alot about smu though he did say that the entire thing made the school looked well established. it's really quite a madness having like 32 buildings in the whole city area (union square) in San Fran. everywhere you turn, you see an academy sign. it kind of juts out of the entire area and spoils the scenery of the city...which really isn't much. Considering that there are like 32 AAU Buildings in the area, it still takes forever to get around. even with all the shuttle busses to provide transport...it's still a pain to get around cos it takes a long time cos you have to make loop-de-loops around the city since most of the roads are one way and though u have the building across the street you still have to take a long time to travel to alight there.

The school's alright. i'm attracted to the standards of the work they do and the connections that they have. the whole USA thing provides a good environment for me to function in, but i don't quite like the entire city environment. the whole city thing makes it very frustrating for me and i get pretty much annoyed and grumpy cos it's so much stuff going on at one time. If there's any kind of environment that stimulates my brain to work...it's that of fisherman's wharf and pier 39..but thats another account for later on. ..so yeah...in summary of the whole experience....i'll go check out SCAD and see which i prefer. hahhaa.

finally meetin up with julie was cool cos she was excited to see me and she was like OH MY GOSH...GLORIA! IT'S SUCH A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU! in this whole american twang. i have no idea if it's true cos everyone in america seems so happy to meet you. i'm still not used to the entire greeting system where i get tongue tied when they greet with "Hey. How's it going?" and i'm like stunned for a while before i reply with....cool/fine/ok/good. i still very much prefer the HELLO :) allows u to react with a reflex. plus..people in the service sector don't quite greet you :S

after talking to julie, we caught the school's graduating student's fashion show and GUESS WHAT?!?! among the models were Chantel and Eugena from America's Next Top Model...yeps...this is to make all fans of ANTM super jealous. haha. it felt so cool...like my bro and i never imagined ourselves seeing them in person kinda thing. and of course...all honour goes to my bro (an avid fan of ANTM) to notice them and point them out. the fashion show was cool....runway and all...pity only 1 of the guy models were hot..most were just pretty boys...and when i say pretty..they are really like GIRL PRETTY. acks...anyway...there's loads of floppy guys at art schools too. it kinda freaked my brother out. heh.

we checked out the golden gate bridge and fisherman's wharf and pier 39 after that. i love the environment there. it's relaxing and there's so much interesting activities going on there. we saw wild sea lions at the pier and there were like loads of them sunbathing and it was quite entertaining. especially the 2 who were super territorial and were trying to fight over a space on a platform. it was really very interesting cos they were really like shoving one another off and when they succeeded the winner would watch out on all side, ready to defend his space. i think my bro got a video on it.

then there were loads of artists there. there was this cool spray paint artist who was superbly talented. He completes like 1 work in like 5 min or under! it's amazing. and his work are like WHOA......damn nice man! think my bro got that on video too. yep...and other cool performances...which are common in USA. haha. it;s cool to see people just lazing around on parks...u'll never get that in Singapore..its tool hot :S

gtg. ciao!

Ride to San Fran

plane ride was smooth thankfully. i didn't get motion sickness. thanks to all who remembered me in prayer!!! :)

though we had terrible turbulance, it was really quite fun. (first time i'm liking turbulance!) it was quite bad and they had to stop the service for quite some time cos it was too dangerous for the stewards to walk around serving us dinner. we had to hold on to our dinner trays to keep them from flying off the table and our drinks were like jumping out of the cup like mad....like how a fish out of water jumps. it was so cool!!!

there was this very fierce head stewardess..but i think she likes me. at first when i asked for chips she said she couldn't give it to me and i had to follow her if i really wanted it..so i was like..nevermind. next thing i know she gave me a whole packet of chips. from then on she was very nice to me...she gave me loads of orange juice and 2 buns (though i don't quite like the dryness of the bread...) for breakfast. haha. what can i say??? i'm lovable. >.<

managed to catch loads of shows that i wanted to watch...like National treasure:book of secrets, Juno, Alvin and Chipmunks, PS I Love You (which we saw them having the premiere at US last year), Hitch and August Rush. man....August Rush was like the bestest bestest show among the whole lot! the music is amazing and i love his passion for music. it's really damn contagious. makes me wish i didn't quit on music in the past...makes me wish i took dance when i was younger...man...so many dreams...that seems too late to chase. SADNESS :(

maybe someday....just maybe......

anyway..the weather ain;t as cold as we expected it to be..it's supposedly like...13 degrees and lower now cos it's night...but i'm surviving with my normal thin white shirt and a jacket. we went to the supermarket to get food for breakfast..like pizza, cornflakes, milk, cookies, water and soup. There's so much instant food available here...soup...pasta...noodles...chicken cutlets...western..italian...asian. i'm not going to starve if i do end up studying here in the end...dude...this is awesome!!! sooo...step 1 of survival in US is probably settled. i'll just miss Singpaore food loads :( FED-EX CHICKEN RICE, HOKKIEN MEE, CHAR KWAY TEOW on a regular basis k!! i'll send u guys my address in US if i do end up studying here! :)

more updates coming soooonnn :)

i'm leaving..on a jet plane...dont know when i'll be back again!...no...actually..i do...I'll be back on the 4th of May!!

don't miss me!!! no..actually..pls do. :)

the plane is madly filled with people from MUMBAI (well..ya know what i mean) !! seriously...like i can count the number of non-mumbai-ians here :S

gotta go board the plane. CIAO PEOPLE IN SINGAPORE!! haha, small fries.

MY GOSH. I HAVE THE MOST LOSER-ISH WAY OF FALLING SICK!!!

my "flu" is not even caused by bugs for goodness sake. it's caused by having water up my nose by accident!!! blardy hell...

was drinking the water at the water cooler on monday when the stupid cooler happily squirt water up my nose and then the moment i felt uncomfortable with stuff in the wrong pipe I KNEW I WAS GOING TO HAVE A FLU. one blocked nose and a throat that feels like i'm swallowing gravel. YICKY. my gawdd...why is my body so weird?!?!?

WHO ELSE FALLS SICK LIKE THAT YOU TELL ME?!?!?!??!

meh...and to think i got a flight to San Fran tmr morn...MANSSSSS....

on a happier note...at least i've got my transcripts etc all settled. PHEW.

SAN FRAN AND GEORGIA...HERE I COMMEEEE :)

i'll miss you guys!!!

i am depressed :(

my musical theatre course is over.

i haven't gotten any news for my auditions.

my life as an actor is over!!! :(

haha. ah wells.

my hse is having a termite infestation!!! COOLIOS. i always thought we never had termites in Singapore. It's not my fault..really. since my parents often told me it was a good thing we don't stay in the states cos houses there are built with wood and when termites come you're a goner. SOoo....it was a big surprise to think that MY house had termites. they're confined to the little runners outside my parent's room toilet..and since it's not connected..it probably means they have a tunnel underneath the floor. maybe one day we'll drop down to our neighbour's hse. haha. termite art. looks kinda like the grand canyon with all it's redness and cool mountainy rocky feel. my dad said the termite medicine that the pest control people used would make them agitated and angsty so they'll go back to their nest and kill each other. MUAHAHHAA. they're coming again on Friday to inspect the whole house and to get rid of the annoying pests.

went for short and sweet auditions yesterday and i'm thankful that it went well and i got through it without forgetting my lines or stuttering or stoning..and most importantly..BARFING. i was so scared my throat and mouth went terribly dry i felt like gagging. I'm glad i could speak and look confident during the entire thing and then come out wanting to puke so badly that all i could do was guesture to sarah and jean that it went well. hahaha.

Yeah. thank God for Nicole Stinton who was our musical theatre teacher for being there to see us audition. poor her...she saw sarah, jean and i consecutively..she must be sick of our monologues after seeing us perform so many times. haha. still. she was very nice and helped make my butterflies in my tumy fly away with all her smiles and nods. she made me feel like i was doing the right thing :) note the word "FEEL". i have no idea whether or not they'll give me a role.

on a brighter side...they boosted my confidence by praising me!!! haha. they said i was good. and impressive for a first timer. MUAHAHHAA. UNLEASH MY POWER!!!!!!!!!! a director got my number...soooo...i'm waiting for news...YIKES! scariness and excitingness...... :)

this whole A level break is an excellent time for me to upgrade myself. skillswise especially. i mean..which other time is best to do all these courses?!?!?! haha. happiness. guitar...acting...watching theatre shows.. plenty plenty more :)

AND OH YA! i checked with the USA embassy and the education centre and i found out that SCAD is accredited. MUAHAHAAs. yay. i hope i can go there cos they have MUSICAL THEATRE as a minor....

or i'll just see AAU and decide for myself. hahahas.

Meet my friend! haha. he's just a puppet that i'm going to use for my children's ministry this sunday. COOLIOS! i like how i can make him laugh!! the only sad thing is there's no way to control his hands..so he'll look quite retarded! my first time in front of the whole group of monkeys..yeeks...God help me...and BLESS ME PLENTY PLENTY!!!

haha

Guitar playing/practising has been good. I think i could be a born natural talent...just that because i never quite learnt music i let it all go to waste..but it's ok...i aim to learn the guitar and the drums and the piano! MUAHAHAs. maybe to make up for my physical inabilities (height) and intellectual disabilities. hahahahhaa.

went back for life con and it felt good..no EXCELLENT to be back in SA. I MISS SA!!!!!!!!!

life con always has it's magic on me. no doubt it wasn't exactly heartfelt worship that i gave, one magic life con has on me is the joy and passion for God to touch SA. It's awesome to see when people come to the front in response. SA to me is GOD'S SCHOOL! we claim it! meh heh heh.

short and sweet didn't get back to me about auditions. i think they don't want me cos with my height...HOW TO GET ANY ROLES?!?!

niao niao niao....goes the guitar...or so i believe.

shaun has taken the initative to teach us 2 interns how to play the guitar. which is obviously going to be harder for me than for bobo since she has musical background (READ MEP AND ORCHESTRA AND CELLO) which means i have to practise extra hard to learn the chords and fingerings and get used to the whole playing instrument thing.

shaun's a good teacher cos he keeps nagging at me to practice after lunch. through practising i realised how lousy my fingers are...they are so WEAK!!! and...also how retarded they are. they keep spamming spastically. SPARSTIC fingers.

now my fingers are raw from chording :'(

i am attracted to a new art school in georgia! it has the major that i want...and it includes web design in that thing thong thang major. and it has musical theatre minor ((OHHHHHHH MEEE WANTTT!!) and it has HORSE RIDING AS A CCA (ME SUPER WANT) and it has christian fellowship to keep me sanely spiritual while i'm far far away from my florida home.

the only problem is accreditations. i dunno how the school is like. how they're connected and shit like that..aieeee..this sucks majorly!!!

the previous week has been pretty hectic. what with all the KJ admin work..photocopying, printing, sorting, writing names and then packing them for the little kiddies. then there was marriage alpha. It seems like because my boss and her husband work at church it's a work for 1 get 1 more employer for free kinda thing. it was getting kind of energy sapping and i'm just glad that i have bobo to help me through it :)

went for life con full dress rehearsals yesterday. sadly the only people from my batch were shaun and johnny minus the dancers cos they're involved in it and expected to come down anyway. Going back to SA brought back many many memories as i caught up with the nice security guard uncle who kept me accompany during my many many late nights at SA during the A level season. Looking at the classrooms, catching up with teachers (albiet how few there were..), reliving the whole life con experience again... it struck me once again how i superly believed that SA was God's school...in a sense that God was the head of the school...not that God had studied there. Remembered how God directed me to SA, how He brought me through the tough times, the friends, the wonderful brothers and sisters in christ to talk with and pray with and whine with.

i struggled with praising God together with the rest, struggled to say God SAVE THESE LOST SOULS. but if there was one thing that united me with them, it would be for the fact that I wanted God to work in a real and personal manner. I could visualise how despite the crowd singing and cheers, the hype, the music and the cc would just fade into nothingness and how time would stand still as each individual had a one-on-one encounter with God. where God would become so real and so personal. where we could get all our doubts erased, hurts healed and faith restored.

met up with half the bunch of brudders to watch PILLOWMAN!!! all of a sudden i'm a spur of arty fartiness...spending my money on such things! my first theatre show. for the past few times i've actually been to watch some theatre show it's usually a musical..forbidden city being my first, wicked, beauty world, dim sum dollies and now! the unmusical actual theatre show..PILLOWMAN!

it's really quite a dark show...goodness know what is going on in the sick writer's mind! nonetheless it was fascinating. i enjoyed the way the main character told the stories, some acted out, some told out with illustrations projected in a comic strip style and all the sound effects. cool stuff. smart considering how simple the set was. i think the play was about how past experiences in your life shaped the way you are, your thinking etc. that everything that you do or that happens have a long lasting impact on you, on the people around you, on circumstances. It's so sad that the pillowman has to do evil things in a nice way. it's scary to just think if he really exists :S eeeee...it'll be really sad if one day i meet the pillowman and he tries to convince me to end my life because i'm going to have a screwed up life in the future. it's either i kill myself now as a kid and not have to go through all that...or i grow up and go through all that shit and then kill myself. so depressing :(

the actors were pretty good. especially the main dude. i can't imagine the amount of script he had to memorise for all that. AIEEEE...and adrain pang was so sweet to get his wife the director on stage to thank her and stuff...everybody go awwwwwwww...

anyway..i signed up for auditions for short and sweet. i have no idea what the hell i'm doing and ah wells. i have a feeling i'm going to regret it when the weekend approaches!

applications are over! FULL STOP.

took the adm faculty test today and i seriously doubt i will get in. hahaha. well..at least the questions they asked were kinda alright...my answers suck though. it's scary how you work and work and work and then you realise that all that you thought you'd do isn't exactly what you were made to do. like the only reason why i'm thinking of doing art is because people tell me i can do it..and it seems like the case. Sadly...i can't do it fantastically well either. :S SAD

After reading Jodi Picoult's Keeping Faith it really kept my thinking about what i believed in. I started asking questions and it made me think through my own faith. I was really looking at things from the perspective of a free thinker. While i don't doubt the existance of God (Hey. you must be blind to miss out that all creation must be created by someone)..i wonder whether perhaps the God i've been believing may not exactly be the same God who created the universe. What if all we knew all these while was a big fat lie? Like maybe we're just trying to give ourselves a purpose to our lives so we have some reason and motivation to life? Who is God really? If He is a God who has been so loving..why did He send His one and only son to die for us? any parent would instinctively protect their kid. why would God love us so much to the extent where he is willing to kill his son for our sake? it's like allowing my kid to die in place for his friend. like what!?!? if God knows everything past present future and He knew that Jesus would rise again from the dead...then is it still considered a valid sacrifice?

isn't it scary to wonder if all your life you've believed in the wrong thing, made the wrong choice and you never knew until you come to the end of everything? what will your life mean if it has been built on the wrong knowledge? will it all come to nothing?

why do we need faith to believe in God? why can't God be like our parents, where it is second nature to just trust in Him? why do they say He can give us comfort in times of hurt and need when we can't hear him, see him or touch him? what about the times where we are in desperate need of a hug or just knowing and feeling him by our sides?

oh..many many God questions...i just want to have him be more real in my life. to know him because i know him for who he really is..not because i learn about him