syfc

i went down to syfc to check things out. it totally wasn't what i had expected.

firstly, i was 5 minutes late. but when i reached the station, i couldn't find anyone waiting for me. so i had to call the person who contacted me. but no one picked up. so i had to call syfc. and through that call, i realised that she had forgotten. ah wellz. nvm.

i followed her when she arrived and it was something very awkward. she introed to me the people there and the stuff they did. it sounds really cool and all and i get pretty excited about it. that was...until i met the entire group of people that i probably will have to work with later on =(

it was terrible. they were all...weird people. weird mad people. seriously!!! i was taken aback by how cheena people out of my life are! i mean...they were speaking and singing chinese! it was all so weird. i couldn't connect with any of them except for grace and 2 other girls. then i found out why. the entire bunch of cheena people were all from the same church and the were all like sec 1s and 2s. and those that i could sort of connect with were sec 3. the leaders thought i just finished my A levels. HAH! i must have appeared very mature compared to the rest! not a compliment to me though. the others were just way childish. i'm sorry. i can't tolerate you people. drove me nuts. and one of the leaders who came to yf to promote syfc turned out to be really mad as well. she was retarded la. acting like a wad...12 year old mad kind of girl stuck in a wad. 30 over year old body?????? and she kept insisting that she was very sane. yes maam..i SO believe you **smiles sweetly**

it's sad how going to an all girls school like ij make me so english-fied, so unable to accept the cheena part of others, how i cannot accept other cultures. nvm. grace was very sweet to help me feel welcome =)

we watched one of their products and had a briefing on the upcoming year. i felt like i was invisible once again. as if i were part of the group or just wasn't there. everything felt so alien. i was at least hoping to find someone familiar or smth. but i didn't. anyway. it felt weird being made to take photos with the group even though i was never part of it. i felt as if i were a ghost who was trying to be part of humans again, squeezing into a photo....aiya. it was all weird la.

i was invited to have a badminton match with them. it was all very confusing since they were such strict rule followers, dunno wad server over and all that language..ah wellz. at least it made time pass faster. i joined them for dinner. thinking that perhaps thigns might be better. things remained as it is and i was very surprised that they didn't wait for one another to get their food so they could pray together. no. everyone came back at their own pace and just...well..ate! weird. not what i had expected. i thought they would be more holy or smth. seems like they werent.

i'm now stuck in a dilemma. i don't know if i should forego my first 3 months for this media project serve thingy or not. i mean. it would be good. considering that i'll be exposed to the media stuff, working and testing out how it feels like, experience, going to professional media areas such as a christian ministry and radio stations to check out how things are. plus..this is the most exciting thing. i'll be going through apprenticeship. like work under a company for 3 weeks and if my work is good enough they'll use it! so cool right?!!?!!!!??!

AHHH...wad to do wad to do??????????????